Isn't this our goal?
For however long we are graced to live on this earth, aren't we all striving to live the best life possible? YES!
I wrote a post on Facebook yesterday (maybe you saw it) sharing a thought on what my best life is. Here's what I said:
this is not my best life. this is my facebook life. you know there is a difference right? I do not run every day. heck I barely run once a week. someone said to me the other day "oh, you are the fit one I see on facebook" and I about choked. No! I am the biggest flake that presses snooze 5+ days a week, that skips yoga because it's too far too drive, that eats crap because it tastes good, that drinks a glass of wine practically nightly. I beat myself up daily for what I don't do with my health and fitness and work and kids and life in general. So can we all collectively remember our best life is what happens in the moments outside of facebook? the moments no one sees or even cares about. when I am snuggled with my son in my bed nose-deep in our books. when my hair is a rat's nest and I have no make up on and I'm cooking breakfast. when my daughter and I are hugging in the kitchen. when I am alone at the dining table (in my glasses and slippers) scrambling to make an income. that is my best life. the one that no one sees. facebook is just a slice. the teeniest, tiniest, smallest slice of our best lives.
I am guessing by the comments posted that this struck a chord with a lot of people. We seem to be crafting a pseudo-life, one that's meticulously curated to showcase a mere fraction -- albeit a beautiful fraction -- of what's actually going on in our lives.
I recently caught myself feeling envious of a couple that I am friends with - the husband is hot, the wife gorgeous, their kids are adorably cute, their world seemingly perfect. Some part of me wanted some part of their life. WTF?
The real me, the real you is NOT what is being broadcast for the world to see.
Maybe it's because I find myself unconsciously grabbing my phone 10 billion times a day to document the micro-moment that's just occurred and that I'm increasingly unable to sit, watch and just absorb life's moments without an urge to take a photo or video.
I just returned from a week in Paraguay. Fantastic trip. And one night, they surprised us with a guest performance by the Paraguay Landfillharmonic (google them, they are amazing). And out of 250 people in the audience, not one person was without their arm sticking out trying to get a shot.
It made me wonder, can we really soak in the beauty in front of us while we are half focused on our phones? Hmmmm. I'm not entirely sure we can be 100% in the moment when we are 20% on our phones.
Let's try this. The next time you reach for your phone intending to take a shot or a video, pause. That's it. I'm not asking you to not take the photo but just pause for a second and ask yourself why.
Why is this photo necessary? Maybe your baby is taking their first steps: NECESSARY! But maybe you are taking a shot of yourself with a new haircut just to post it to Facebook. And subsequently to get likes and positive comments and admiration. And if that's the case, it's worth asking why.
I'm telling you all this because I need the reminder. I need to pause more and ask myself why. What is it about my life right now that requires approval or validation or praise from others?
A bit heavy I know, but a worthwhile consideration.
Every second we spend comparing our real life to the facebook lives of others is a complete and total waste. Not to mention it sends us into a spiral about what's not in our life that others appear to have. More money, more happiness, more love, more whatever it is we feel we are lacking in our own facebook feed.
Let's remember, there is so much more to us than what we show the world.
There are stresses and tears and bruises and cellulite and tumors and anger and a whole lot of other crap that makes up our real life.
And it's that kind of yucky stuff that should be appreciated, glorified even. For in the messy mess of that part of life, we find ourselves and so much more. We find grace and gratitude and appreciation and peace and love and growth.
Starting today, let's commit to living a slightly less phone-filled life, one we are all proud to call our best.